2017 has flown past and now it’s only a few sleeps till Christmas. Not only did time fly even faster than normal, Peter and I spent many days above the clouds, traveling overseas and interstate for study and business. All this flying and waiting around airports gave me lots of time to reflect on the meaning of life.
We are all in pursuit of happiness, yet looking at my fellow travellers its obvious that very few people are happy. One of the problems is that nobody taught us at school how to go about it!
So here are a few of my observations on how to create a happiness mindset:
- 1. In real life, unlike flying, the journey is more important than the destination. If we think of life as jumping from one destination to the next, we end up missing out on many deliciously happy moments dotted along the way, because we are too intent on the “outcome”.
To create happiness, we need to become more in harmony with our journey and stop thinking like: “when I meet my soulmate” (destination) “when I pay off my mortgage” (another destination), “when I finish my exams” (idem ditto), “when my baby sleeps all night” (the ultimate unthinkable epitome of happiness), then I will be happy. In other words, we make excuses for our not-happiness right now. We want something to change first and then we will be happy. (So we think). Yet the real secret of happiness lies in living our lives moment by moment with full awareness, like we used to do as children. If we don’t realise this sooner or later, we will be cheated of LIFE!
- 2. When there is a sudden change in our flight schedule, we feel upset, overwhelmed or hard done by. We experience it as a huge problem and problems make us unhappy.
What if we replaced our impatience by a sense of curiosity, realising that nothing in the Universe happens without careful planning? If there is no such thing as coincidence, perhaps we could see it as an opportunity to experience something different. Something surprisingly good might result because of the delay! My favourite phrase is: why is this happening for me, rather than to me. This immediately changes my perspective on any stressful situation and I start looking for the benefits in any given problem. My experience tells me that many problems are simply opportunities in disguise! Once I figure out what awesome opportunity is hiding within the problem, my happiness levels will go through the roof!
- 3. One of our flights was extremely turbulent. The plane was jostled about as giant winds played games with us. We all had to keep our seatbelts fastened and stay put. Even the meals had to wait.
Once I got over my anxiety I realised that planes are designed by engineers to take turbulence in their stride. Aeroplanes have inbuilt flexibility, and as long as the fuel supply to the engines isn’t interrupted, and the captain sticks to the flightpath, there is nothing to worry about. The plane doesn’t waste energy flapping its wings or rebelling against the weather patterns, it calmly cuts its way through the turbulence and remains on course. Life is always going to throw us curveballs, but that doesn’t mean we have to get caught up in the drama of it, throw our hands up and cry “Why me? Why is this happening?” If we believe that our circumstances should be different than they are during a crisis, we will end up defeated, hurt and unhappy. We simply need to buckle up, ride out the storm and refrain from making rash decisions while we are being tossed around. This too shall pass!
We all love plain sailing, but that would be a waste of our potential. We are precision engineered by our Creator to have our biggest transformational moments during times of distress and acute crisis. In the darkest moments of our lives, we suddenly find the answers that will benefit us (and our community) for the rest of our lives. We sometimes even find deep peace and joy when we least expect it. In January 2006 I personally experienced how resilient we are, and how important the right mindset is. If somebody had told me the day before I got hit by a passing truck that I would be able to survive a closed head injury, broken neck, ten broken vertebrae, fractured ribs, a shattered sacrum, an exploded pelvis, a ruptured liver, life threatening internal bleeding, cuts, bruises and grazes, and a broken leg, I would have laughed, or cried. Either way, I wouldn’t have believed it.
Yet that was the size of the curve ball life threw at me. I was told I might never walk again, as I was left without a sacrum, and that my bowel and bladder would never recover. I would need to take painkillers for the rest of my life and was likely to become a morphine addict.
I rejected the medical prognosis and decided to believe in myself instead. I was in uncharted territory and if it was to be, it was up to me! My mindset paid off: I made the most miraculous recovery, astounded everyone (including myself) and six months later I was not only walking (with a walking stick) but had started work again, in part time fashion. Nine months after the accident I had weaned myself off all painkillers. Life started to take on some sort of normality with me not only seeing clients, but also helping in the renovations of the Purple House (plastering, painting and cleaning) and being a mum to our 6 children. I nearly died again in January 2013 from a bowel obstruction. This was the culmination of 7 years of bowel obstructions due to the internal bleeding. Once again, the medical world saved my life, by doing an emergency operation to clean out scar tissue and untangling my intestines. I guess that completed the full circle of healing from the MVA for me.
I don’t have any whiplash symptoms or pain and only experience some stiffness in my lower back. My bladder and bowel respond to my nervous system and I can do anything I put my mind to. I now use my story of my NDE and subsequent recovery to inspire and teach my clients to believe in themselves, to aim higher than ever, to find out what fuels their engines, to go after it and to never give up!
Most people want to know how to control pain and restrictions. That is like trying to control the winds that buffet the plane. They see pain as an outside influence…. they are led to believe that they are being attacked by their immune system, by the cancer germ, by a virus, or by their hormones. I see pain as a messenger, and once we understand the message, the pain/messenger can be laid to rest.
What if I told you that you are much bigger than your worst pain? And that you are so much more than your limitations? I am living proof, and I don’t have superpowers, I am flesh and blood, the same as you. If I can do it, so can you. I believe in you!
With our help, make 2018 the best year of your life and the start of many wonderful things to come! Thank you for being our loyal client.
I invite you to have a look at the range of therapies and treatments we offer. The colour chakra massage is new and extremely popular. There are many exciting things in store for 2018. You can now download the app: www.purplehousenaturaltherapies.com.au on your phone and in 2018 you will be able to book your appointments from the comfort of your phone, anywhere, anytime. There will be a range of workshops that we have never offered before and are not done anywhere else in the world. Stay in touch by going to http://bit.ly/Gradasblog
Much love from Peter & Grada, Melanie, Tania, Sarah-Anne, Tarley, Caleb, Blaize, Lisanne, Eve, Mieke, Chrissy, Soraya and Ben.